Sunday, February 12, 2012

Old Fashioned Lady

I think I finally understand. I understand my grandparents and my parents all those years ago trying to keep things simple, keep things on track and disagreeing with the changes. I imagine they saw it coming.

Times have changed and the older I get, the more I try to hang on to what I knew once upon a time. Strange how the table has turned on me and I see things in a different light.

I understand that change is good, at least that's what I hear. Trust me when I say, in my life, I have seen and experienced much change.

What I don't get, what I struggle with is letting go of values, family values. I am all for progress, love the internet, love the fact I can call anyone anywhere in a moments time in every room in the house or car for that matter. I like the instantness of an email, blog, social network and text messages. It's all good in small doses.

I miss the old days and call me old fashioned, but I miss that good old time together as a family. I know I have found myself caught up in the technological age the same as everyone else, so call me guitly as everyone else.

With all these changes since I was a little girl, I find many things I never really thought of then, but miss now. What I miss  most is talking face to face, writing long letters, and family dinners at the kitchen table. I miss land line phones without call waiting, I miss limited access to TV and board games. I miss the one on one you can only get if you sit across from someone and really listen to them and not the cell phone dinging a text message or call from someone who evidently is more important than my company.

I like to observe people and find myself highly agitated at what I see these days. Recenly, in my own home, I watched my family sitting next to each other, but not looking at each other or speaking. Each head was bowed, not in prayer, not in sleep, but eyeing their individual cell phone or music devise. Sounds emitted in the air, but not of conversation, it was all techno talk. Later having dinner with a friend, I watched the same thing all around me at tables. People were not paying any attention to those they were with but to the world outside. Phone chatter, finger texts, TV blaring and a lot of very sad faces.

I wonder why the world is in a state of funk, is it because we have lost our core values? We are so busy and these gagets can sure make life easy, but only to a point. What I find with the tech world is that I have less time than ever before, my health is worse, my stress level higher. We have it easy, or so the experts tell us. If you ask me, we do not have it easy, we have made it worse.

I am dissatisfied with the world around me, that is not to say I do not feel very blessed, for God surely has blessed me. It does not either say I am unhappy with my life, for I am. But I miss the "good ole days", I miss shows that are not vulgar, movies that do not sprinkle every sentence with the "F" bomb and make me cringe. (Instead, call me a prude now, I turn it off). I miss real conversations with live people talking about what matters most. I miss long walks even on cold days just because. I miss board games (which our family has recently started playing again) instead of animated, loud violent video games.

I miss values and I voice it often. I am sure those around me are sick and tired of it. I want to sometimes scream at the top of my lungs, "WAKE UP!" Life is too short, I have lost too many loved ones to realize the value of those precious moments. You can not go back in time and recapture those lost moments.

I write those long letters by the way, some of you may be a receiver of them. I recently lost someone very dear to me who wrote me long and beautiful letters. For two long months I could not bring a pen to paper or type a word due to my grief. He brought to me values in life, value to family and meaning to things that I had sometimes forgot. I miss him and in my grief, find myself thinking on these things more often.

People are important and as much as we would like to say we have three hundred friends on a social network site, how many of those so called friends have you spoken with recently? Do you really know their every dream and thought?

I tell my children and grandchildren all the time how important it is to spend time together. I am sure they are quite sick of hearing it. At my age I value time, I cherish those moments together. I am tired, I am older, I am just as busy as the next person. There are times I wish to just ignore it all and rest. However, I know the value of hearing a child laugh, of listening to one of my daughters or sons tell me about their days. I long to listen to them, to watch the expressions on their faces and really soak it all up. I have today, I have this precious moment, I have now. That is all I know.

So when you see me next, turn off your phone and lets talk.

Teresa Gale